The Given Garden Page 18

  Kohén chanced another step towards me, and grew blurry as my vision clouded over with tears. Then, as though he’d read my thoughts he said: ‘Stop thinking whatever it is that you’re thinking! I’m sorry that I couldn’t warn you about this and I’m very, VERY sorry that I wasn’t told before today either, but I don’t care what anyone says: Larkin, I will die before I allow you to become a paid Companion!’

  ‘How can you prevent it?’ I croaked again, chancing a tentative step toward him, fuelled by the slightest smudge of hope that I’d ever allowed myself to feel. ‘Maryah said it was comply or be banished!’

  Kohén looked back at his brother, who nodded gently, and Kohén exhaled heavily. ‘Larkin, it’s true that you don’t have a choice in whether I can touch you or not- but I do!’ He pressed his hands together and I saw that his fingers were sparking- red. He was angry! He stepped forward again, lowered his voice and whispered. ‘And I will cut my arm off at the shoulder before I ever lay a hand on you.’

  For the second time that day, my emotions got the better of me, and I fainted. I saw Kohén rushing forward to catch me before I could lose consciousness, and then suddenly all I knew was warmth and hope and … love. For one brief second, it actually occurred to me that Kohén could have been someone who I would fall in love with one day. Not my brother, but my knight in shining armour. My Romeo. My Rhett. My Mr Darcy. My beautiful, sweet best friend.

  Then I heard him whisper: ‘Do not fret ugly duckling, for you will never be made into a swan for me,’ and I cut off my less than sisterly affection for him before the blackness came.

  I needed to find another ugly duckling, for this prince’s kiss would kill me, not transform me.

  *

  When I came to, I discovered that Kohén and Karol were propping me up beside the cottage and that Kohén was muttering about how they: ‘Needed to feed this one more.’

  ‘What did you say?’ I croaked.

  Karol looked up with eyebrows raised, then glanced at his brother and slowly began to back away. ‘I uh… you need something to eat, Miss Whittaker. I’ll go see that something is fetched for you.’

  ‘Not you,’ I managed, amazed that he’d called me by the name that I was starting to forget for they were never used within the palace. I waved Karol off before turning to Kohén, for in my eyes he was a no-good fornicator whose hands I didn’t want near my food. I grabbed Kohén’s long black sleeve, which was made of a tightly woven mesh that felt feather-soft. ‘You! What did you say about me not being a…’ I buried my face in my hands. ‘Oh devil…if you’re lying to me...’ a curse which sounded foreign slipping off the top of my tongue for the first time in my life.

  ‘I wasn’t Larkin I swear it so please, don’t praise her name.’ He sighed and sank down across from me on the cold stone ground. ‘There’s a way for you to escape this awful skin trade. Your teacher would not have mentioned it, for it is a rare occurrence, and my brother doesn’t want me to confess to it now and get your hopes up... but there ARE Given girls who have been spared this label before- girls who proved to be of more use to the kingdom by using their minds rather than their bodies just as members of other castes have risen into the rank of nobility, and I know that could be you! In fact, I don’t see how it could go any other way for you.’ He smiled crookedly at my surprised and eager expression. ‘If you make it to your twenty-first as untouched as you are now, but with the education of a noblewoman, then you will be released as a member of society: educated, refined, well-bred- and free to take the examination, qualify for a new caste and follow her own path!’

  My heart skipped a beat. ‘But… but the elixir…’

  Kohén grimaced. ‘That I can do nothing about, Larkin and I am sorry for that… but you do not need to breed to qualify for marriage or for the academics or as a farmer as you wish to… and all of those doors will be open for you if you leave as a virgin.’ He shrugged. ‘Besides, in other kingdoms, infertile couples can elect to adopt orphans or unwanted babies, so who knows? Maybe one day you could spare a child this fate all together and still be able to call yourself a mother.’

  My soul flickered with the wings of hope, for Kohén was right and most importantly, the kingdoms that allowed adoption were Janiel… and Yael, the very kingdom that I hoped to move to!

  ‘If what you’re saying is true…’ I swallowed down a lump of emotion. If what Kohén was saying was true, then all of my dreams could come true yet! I’d never have a child of my own but Lindy loved me like a mother when she could and that was enough for me!

  ‘It is.’ Kohén smiled grimly. ‘How do you think Maryah ended up as a tutor, and not a Companion? She too was Given, but she was not accepted by my father and so, she qualified for the Academic caste and makes her living training others now.’ He must have seen me blanch because he rushed to add: ‘You wouldn’t have to do that, of course, but it’s an option. And options are what you’ll have in spades on my word!’

  My eyes widened further, and my words came in a rush of excitement. ‘Why didn’t she tell us any of this? Or about herself?’

  ‘Like I said, it does not happen often and unlike you, she actually wanted to become a Companion, so she sees the fact that she has risen above her caste because my father didn’t find her appealing as a shameful fact.’ He made a face. ‘She chose to haunt this castle and to tutor the girls Given after her, probably hoping that one day my father would beckon to her as he never did before.’ This time, I made the face and Kohén nodded. ‘It’s distasteful, and I’d prefer it if you did not bring it up with her to spare her feelings, but it is a fact: Maryah was overlooked and ended up as a member of the nobility for her services, and you will too, if you take advantage of your education and see your dreams through.’ He scratched his temple and made a face, his cheeks reddening again in a way that slowly spread right across his complexion. ‘Honestly, I don’t see myself going within fifteen feet of any of you now, because it’s just creepy-’ he cringed. ‘But you, little lark, were practically a boy to me BEFORE I learned what I did today, so though I don’t know how things will progress with the other girls, I can assure you that you’re off-limits to me!’

  I pressed my hand to my chest. ‘You are not jesting with me?’

  ‘About finding you unattractive but wanting to keep you around to lock horns with? Come on, Lark- you know me better than that.’ He held up his hands and grinned at me, and my horror melted like snow under the hottest summer sun. Warmed all over, I flung myself into his arms and hugged him so tightly that he actually grunted.

  ‘Please, swear to me that you mean this!’ I exclaimed, happiness flooding my system. I was back on track and now I knew which track not to deviate from!

  ‘I won’t touch you. I do not desire to, and I never will. Well…’ he pulled himself from my embrace and held out one hand. ‘Beyond shaking your hand to seal this deal now, of course.’

  I took his hand and pumped it jauntily. ‘It’s sealed! You spare me your desire-’

  ‘And you spare me your hysteria now, as a trade.’ Kohén laughed and pulled me to him, rubbing at my scalp with his knuckles and mussing up my hair. ‘And I can’t believe you thought otherwise for even a second! Of all of the soccer balls I’ve ever kicked into your head, when have I ever offered to kiss it better?’ He pushed me away and I giggled, rubbing my tender scalp.

  ‘Ease up,’ I said jokingly, though my scalp tingled from where he’d touched me. In his relief, he’d transferred some of his heat and energy into me at his touch, and my mind was buzzing a little. ‘I’m a lady, remember?’

  ‘Not yet. But you will be!’ Kohén winked and backed away, looking more Nephilim than he ever had before, with his dark eyes sparkling. ‘Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go into hiding until you’re all twenty-one!’

  And with that, my friend hurried out of the courtyard and back inside the corridor, barking something at Karol who immediately began to speak to him the moment that the door swung shut between them and me.
He had clearly lingered in the hall to supervise us (instead of fetching me food as he’d said) and was obviously scolding Kohén, but I didn’t care what Karol the icky fornicator of five women thought anymore! As far as I was concerned, the true leader of the Barachiel family was the youngest heir, not the next in line.

  I had never thought much of the ‘hereditary’ label either, but if anyone could change that, it would be Kohén Barachiel. Heaven knew that he’d changed me.

  15.

  Maryah had sworn that our life wouldn’t feel much different until well into our fifteenth year, but that proved to be just one more of her many lies, because things changed from the moment that our understanding did.

  All of our girls cried in their bunks that night, and two even demanded that they be allowed to return home for a sojourn with their families but of course, those sort of demands had been anticipated and were instantly refused. Kelia and Emmerly were the ones who took it the hardest of course, growing angrier with every passing moment, and though I agreed that the matter was unfair because only our gender was forced into this sort of physical contract with the kingdom, they plead being above the duty because of their caste, and that made me angry. For the first time ever, I turned my back on Kelia, and Lette snubbed Emmerly and all six of them eyeballed Kelia and Elfin respectively, knowing as I did, that the fairest of us all would end up becoming the prince’s ‘favourites,’ when the time came for the bulk of us to be kicked out to the commoners. Their position wouldn’t change, but at least they’d probably be chosen to go serving only Prince Kohén in the lap of luxury, while the others slummed it.

  If Kohén kept his word and wasn’t simply lying about the virginity clause to placate me, I wouldn’t be joining them, but Kohén had begged me not to share that loophole with them (it was against the rules for me to know), and I intended to keep that promise, and slip through the cracks of the system, not bust it open. A part of me knew that was wrong, as though I were holding the key to a door that I intended to lock behind me and trap them inside with- but if I did make it out, I would do everything I could to make sure that the next batch of ‘Given’ girls were given the same opportunity as I wanted, and that the prince in line for them would be as kind and understanding as Kohén had been with me. The nobility had influence after all and Kohén was right, I was smart enough to qualify for the academics and then catapult myself higher after!

  ‘You can’t honestly believe that it’s less fair to use a noble girl over an Artisan’s daughter, can you?’ Lette had demanded hotly of Kelia, having to speak over Martya for Kelia to hear her. ‘Wipe your eyes, darling- your tears are made up of saltwater, just like mine!’

  I winced, for I didn’t like hearing sweet little Kelia spoken to so harshly. I opened my mouth to tell Lette to back off, but Kelia spoke before I did.

  ‘No, I’m crying because I know that you’ll probably kill me to take me out of the running as Kohén’s favourite!’ Kelia shot back and my eyes flew open. ‘Or try and cut my face to ribbons so that I’m on equal footing with the rest of you!’

  On the bunk beneath me, I heard Martya suck in a breath, but I didn’t feel that insult. Martya and Lette were both much plainer than Elfin, Emmerly and Kelia, but they weren’t ‘ugly’ like me so it was probably the first time they’d been insulted about their looks. I, on the other hand, stood out like a seagull amongst swans and was used to hearing about it. I rolled over and felt Martya’s hand clutch mine, and we embraced briefly like that.

  ‘Oooh, you are a little witch!’ Elfin snapped, taking offence even though she was the last person in the room who probably should have. She jumped off her top bunk and began to march along the room towards Kelia’s bed, and my scalp prickled in consternation. Were they going to actually fight? ‘Who do you think you are?’

  ‘I wasn’t talking to YOU!’

  ‘But you were talking to my friend! And I’m an Artisan too, so I don’t appreciate your snivelling about how beneath you any of this is! You’re on the exact same level as the rest of us!’

  Yep, they were going to fight and that was no surprise. It was pretty hard to have an involved discussion quietly within the dormitory, for it was so long, and the bunk beds made it pretty hard to see the people you were talking to if they weren’t directly beside you. As a result, there was going to be shouting or traveling required for a heated group debate, and that night, Elfin seemed fixed on doing both. It was actually rather strange to see her pass by my feet because for as long as I could remember, Kelia, Martya and I had been the only ones to occupy ‘our’ side of the room, while Rayleigh, Lette, Elfin and Emmerly had huddled at theirs. There had been an invisible line down the centre of the dormitory and now, Elfin was crossing it and seemed eager to cross many others. We had curtains on runners between each set of bunks, and though I hadn’t seen them pulled shut once since I’d moved into the palace (I think the other four enjoyed the fact that we three got to see just how excluded we were, not to mention how beautiful the view was out Kelia’s window) I was tempted to pull it shut now. Our room was pretty in a bland, dollhouse sort of way, and it was certainly large, but that night it felt much too small, and with every stomp, which Elfin took toward Kelia’s bed, it seemed to shrink further.

  ‘You think Kohén’s going to want you more than the rest of us?’ Elfin went on, when Kelia refused to respond to the dig about her caste. ‘You may be pretty, Kelia, but you look closer to seven than thirteen, and that hasn’t changed in three years!’ She flipped her caramel-coloured hair over her shoulder and sneered down at Kelia. ‘I’ll bet you haven’t even started blossoming yet, have you, little baby?’

  ‘She hasn’t!’ Emmerly announced. ‘She told me last month!’

  I bit my lip, glad that the room was dark enough to hide my flush, even though a full moon was reflecting off every dresser mirror. I hadn’t started any of that ‘blossoming’ stuff yet either- and I wasn’t aware that any of them had aside from Elfin! My eyes flitted to Elfin, and I began to see the signs of hormonal changes upon her. She’d gotten taller and had begun to develop breasts, and I supposed that meant that she’d started bleeding too. Though Emmerly wasn’t anywhere near as tall as Elfin, her figure was already much fuller around her breasts and backside, and Lette was just tall and flat. Did she bleed as well? What about Martya, who was in the middle of all of us? What if Kelia and I were the only ones who weren’t becoming women in the physical sense?

  Praise that damned God if that’s true! The early bloomers will be the first ones Kohén notices, right? That means that Kelia’s safer for longer!

  But my stomach lurched at what should have been a comforting thought because suddenly I was imagining Kohén locking the door to the north wing between me and his new, more amusing companions instead of coming outside to play soccer with me, and that was a pretty unwelcome thought. I’d been so worried about what he’d expect of me, that I’d forgotten to worry about how it would feel when he started expecting more from others! He didn’t seem eager to do that, but he would take advantage of his harem, wouldn’t he? After all, it was the way.

  Yes lark, the eagle’s about to soar out of your imagined intimacy...

  ‘That’s none of your business!’ Kelia retorted. ‘And the fact that I look this young now only means that I’ll still look beautiful when you’re starting to shrivel up with age!’

  ‘Like you know how ageing works- you’re thirteen and still can’t finish a text book!’

  ‘Well, my eyes won’t get all lined from squinting then, will they?’ Kelia huffed back.

  ‘Who cares who can read and who can’t?’ Martya asked from beneath me, her voice muted to me. ‘We’re not here for our brains, girls. OR our looks, OR our caste. Kohén met us all, decided if we were worth keeping around as playmates and then has ignored us for eight years because we clearly weren’t. When he gets old enough to want us for the reasons why we were brought here, he won’t care if you’re the fairest of them all, or the smartest or from the lowest
caste-’

  ‘There is no ‘lowest’ caste!’ Lette broke in.

  ‘Ever noticed how only the artisans think that?’ Kelia said sweetly, and I was one of the many who turned to give her what for, but Martya hurried on:

  ‘It doesn’t matter! WE don’t matter! Not our faces or our bodies none of it- when he chooses a favourite, it will be an instinctive thing, chemical or possibly over the most flexible, but not ONE of us has read enough to know who that’s going to be, so fighting over who it should or shouldn’t be now is pointless, believe me.’

  ‘So if none of us is smart enough to know who Kohén’s going to want the most, how are you smart enough to declare it?’ Emmerly asked.

  ‘Because my aunt is Karol’s Companion,’ Martya said flatly, and we all gasped. ‘And she’s not beautiful in the traditional sense, or dark, or ladylike and she comes from the farming caste, just like my mother did.’

  We all stared at her for a full minute in stupefied silence before the screaming started.

  ‘WHAT?!’ Kelia shrieked, pushing her long copper-coloured curls out of her eyes.

  ‘How could you know this but not tell us?’ Lette cried. I hung off the bed to gape at Martya, who was sitting up, hugging her pillow and looking nervous. My ponytail fell over my eyes and I held it back from my face, amazed by how heavy it had become. Noticing the movement, she locked eyes with me.

  ‘Because I only just worked it out today,’ she said softly. ‘When Maryah told us… it just clicked, you know? I’ve seen her around the castle a few times and we’ve never ever been close, so I don’t know much about her aside from the fact that she’s my mother’s little sister and that she’s been gone for like, sixteen years…’ her voice drifted off, and her eyes followed it, landing on Lette across from her. ‘I’ve grown up knowing that she was here and that we might cross paths, but I didn’t know that we were on the same one until Maryah told us about the gold necklaces and the white dresses. That’s when I realised that Adeline wears more gold than any of them.’